The other day I was having a bagel at the local bagel shop. It was morning, so the news was on the TV.  A report was made that used the word self-compassion.  Now I think to myself, “I couldn’t have been awake.” Unfortunately, I was not dreaming.  I was awake!

Self-compassion makes the word, compassion, meaningless.  In the Oxford American Dictionary, compassion is described as “a sympathetic pity and concern for the sufferings or misfortunes of others.”  What then is self-compassion?  It must be to have pity on the misfortunes of the self. The word is nothing less than an assault on the term, compassion, reflecting the place our culture is right now.  It is highly self-centered.

Self-compassion means to be kind to ourselves, not to be hard on ourselves.  Perhaps, one needs to find another word for self-compassion that is not the proper word.  It corrupts the very meaning of compassion.  It directs attention to oneself and forgets the neighbor.  Jesus would not talk about self-compassion, and he doesn’t in the Gospels.

Self-compassion is successor to self-esteem. Both words boil down to self-centeredness.  How do we get out of this self-obsession?  I don’t know.  The Church, though, should continue to call its membership to reach out to others to give them help and support.  Our message is one of the compassion of the Lord toward us, and our compassion toward the neighbor, even the enemy.

The Good Samaritan, when he encountered the man lying on the road, was not thinking of himself, but of the needs of the victim.  He made provision for the man so that he would live.  This sort of thing is compassion, not self-compassion–an exhausting trip into nothingness.

If our secular society continues down the path of self-obsession, it will end up crashing and burning.  When we witness and defend the faith, we are showing compassion to others.  Let us continue following our Lord who showed compassion, even sacrificing His life to give us forgiveness, life, and salvation. It is this mission that is worthy of us, not self-compassion–a cultural stunt of the 21st century.

Michael G. Tavella

mgtavella@msn.com

October 1, 2024